257

Shattering

On the verge of shattering

the wonderful world of words

they approach, come near

because they already know

soon I will utilise them

them, so joyfully inviting me

I take part in the feast

among syllables, rhymes,

homophones, false cognates.

We are all here for eating

for devouring one another,

not feeling advantageous

just living the moment

whilst marvellous stanzas

they shall materialise,

shaping up to dazzling smiles.

Coming from your mouth,

what else could I ask for?

I am not surprised,

no, not at all.

256

Self inflicted

Love making

self inflicted

upon my body

not always definite

I fancy souls

I hate spectacles

I prefer blurry vision

I admire differences

customised scenarios

to set myself free

from locks and cages.

255

Eyes

Never deprive me from your eyes

I want to gaze at them
as you do it with mine.

Every time I read your lines

I look in my pocket of, there we are,

relentlessly carrying me, is it you,

whilst your prose, your tongue

very well is it tanunting me

causing my comeback

I cannot take it anymore

come kiss me, boy.

254

Sunsets

Sunsets are not the same

no, baby, not at all.

Neither is my soul, non-stop

you know, time fucking flies

hark! tick tock tick tock

What time is it now?

Is it soon or is it too late for us,

for me to come and sit by your side?

252

Anniversary

Three years have been

since I began a new lifestyle -

walking around the world

totally make up free.

Of course it soon expired,

yet none of that matters.

It is like dropping a mask,

a time consuming costume at last.

I know people do not really mind.

Trust me on this one,

people their own film star

you are just a cameo in their lives.

250

Influence

disturb my sight with a tiny smile

scan my thoughts with your wisdom

predict my movements each time desire returns

torute my prejudice my black veil

make me love your madness

make me staarve without your mouth

so that by the end of the day

I always come back to your house/heart

so that by the end of the times

my admiration for you escalates

249

Abduction

Abducted by your darkness

your stream of consciousness

I am so thrilled, I wake up,

losing the cliff heights,

no lighthouse, no lantern

your extinct love fire

missing you, needing you,

pondering the possibility

of losing that unique and only

poetic point of view.

248

Muse

My muse, my wet dream

in here there's a limbo

among brutal nightmares.

Abducted by darkness -

damn, lust yells at night.

I'm so afraid to wake up

missing you, needing you,

but oh no, night also comes

asking me for a second ride

and, speaking in tongues,

it craves for self love.

247

Science

Developing a customised theoretical framework

for such a simple yet emotional glimpse,

making carefully selected observations

in order not to commit further regretful errors.

Conducting and repeating trials -

carrying out experiments just in case.

Gathering meaningful information

your gaze tests emotional strength.

All this to verify my very own predictions,

that I am such a soulful mess.

246

Rainforest

I am plainly soaking wet

no longer may I recognise

the game I should play,

or who I really am,

I am my only making through the day,

as I shed skin and fur,

I become into a different shape.

Even until today

humidity can be smelled

now the Lloró rainforest

having taking place here,

having become an animal, me,

violently do I flap my wings,

yet peacefully do I close my eyes.

Approaching stars, they are shining,

among lightbulbs, beetles

I perceive shades of colours -

turquoise, blue, orange, green;

I notices shades of meaning -

watch, gaze, look, glance, see.

245

Mourning III

Si algo comprendí

a lo largo de estas semanas,

para mi sorpresa cuatro

de este espantoso hiato

es que aún me encantás,

me gustás demasiado,

sin embargo

no puede ser, no será,

pues aquello que me gusta

es la idea que me hice de vos.

No soy la misma,

no pretendo mirar hacia atrás.

La situación me hace infeliz,

de mismo modo

la distancia emociona,

la distancia geográfica.

Me atraés con fuerza magnética,

no lo intentaré negar;

seguís siendo mi musa inspiradora

aún en la oscuridad,

en total clandestinidad,

la de mis sábanas

aunque me resista con uñas y dientes

a la posibilidad de regresar.

Tal vez nuestras ramas

se tomaron licencia

de crecer en forma desmedida,

se fueron, se alejaron,

en otra realidad se encuentran ahora.

Tal vez vaya siendo hora

del lazo espiritual

al fin quebrantar,

tal vez sea tiempo

de antes del verano

las ramas llegar a podar.

244

Mourning II

Me trago los sentimientos

casi que guardo dolor

cual ampolla de pus,

como si mi corazón

fuera un chaleco antibalas

sin amor para vos;

cuando en verdad no es tal

la fortaleza en mi alma.

A veces, debo admitirlo,

fantaseo con sentirlo así.

Tengo hambre,

tengo sed,

soy tan vulnerable

me desespera

no saber

qué

hacer;

pues me acostumbré,

tales necesidades las cubría

el propio ser,

luego por mutuo cariño,

antaño inconmensurable.

Una vez más en este lugar

me he quedado en cero-

Extenuada me siento

no hay energía

no hay predisposición

para pasarla un poco mejor;

sólo siento que extraño,

pero hace falta más,

mucho más que eso

para volver a considerarlo

otro posible tormento.

Me devoro los sentimientos

sin agua, sin anestesia los trago,

te muestro como si no,

indiferencia hacia lo que ocurrió;

nada más alejado de la realidad.

Total normalidad,

nada para proyectar.

Pura intuición acá,

mas porto esa certeza

de que el mareo puedo soportar.

¿A ver hasta cuándo,

a ver para cuándo

seguir repitiendo y no marchar?

243

Mourning I

Aún no lo descifro,

causales, variables,

cansancio, frustración.

Un paradigma harto relativo

áquel que se me presentó –

¿Quién habrá sido

ese monumental vencedor?

Ya no descarto nada

tal vez fueron los dos.

De todos modos

poco de esto ya importa,

pues me reduje a cero.

Incolora, nula, inerte;

aquí un desierto yace.

242

Loop

An infinite loop or creative process

that so much is it involved

when splitting the atom,

the nucleus of paradigms,

of self-imposed lies;

thus final final stop for the status quo

conformed by archaistic knives.

Now breaking up, not grouping,

like a driving force here bursting;

never more miracles shall I crave,

for what comes next will remain

only insofar as it becomes

utterly incessant and necessary,

widely arguable to everybody

for me to keep on writing;

food for thought, delivery coming.

241

Repetition II

I write

I write because I can’t lie;

I can’t lie

I can’t lie because I can’t find

a way of living

a way of not hesitating

a way of breathing

a way of coping with everything

a way of feeling without grabbing.

240

Uterus

My uterus started crying

before lights abandoned me.

Blood seems to have died slowly,

and so does our mutual affection, honey.

Your voice is yelling so silently

it barely sounds like nothing

in the middle of nowhere,

the Lut desert, no oasis.

Pain, decay, suffering –

all guests to enjoy the party

every sensation but caring,

looking after each other,

looking forward to bad times enduring.

Each of them, they all arrive,

they gather, they await

for my very last act,

until the dreadful finale.

239

Diecisiete

Un día entero para llorar

con exactitud diecisiete horas

lloriqueando por lo que no fue.

Irrumpió con rayos y truenos

a la falacia libró su suerte

se desató la magia, la barbarie

de quienes odian las interrupciones

de quienes detestan ser detestados

de quienes gotea lo que no podrán desear.