302

Fire

Sun, set me on fire

sweating, water

that's what we sense

lack of breeze in between.

Sun, set me on fire

I can't take it any longer

if I'm meant to survive

I want that by my side.

300

Colourful

Colourful sunsets,

they mean so much to me.

Lifeless, distracted people

unable to perceive

how many colours

the sky provides.

Nothing can they feel,

something I cannot believe.

Me, no need to travel,

no need to use a spying glass

in order to quietly sit down

and carefully observe

all this while crying

all this while daydreaming.

I wish one fine day

their phones they will forget;

that day, they will fall in love

without bodies and hearts.

299

Black and White

Pitch black, darkness,

I can distinguish nothing

so I politely ask the stars

to light my reality up,

so what do I get?

Complete enlightenment

my eyes, my skin, my lips

all focused on me

my brain shuts down

so as to restore my heart

make it beat, come alive

I give in to heal

for this is just the start.

296

Chaos

I am the utter chaos

trying to conquer words

and I will continue

knocking at your door

whispering in your ear

the wind will bring butterflies

my voice will belong to the breeze

while that strange driving force

will make them fly

without them flapping their wings

chaos will free your mind

let me in, you will see

your hallway will turn wide.

295

A Bird

There are times

when I blame instinct

when I challenge fate,

but it doesn't means

nature's accepted the deal.

That's what took place

last night, you, standing there

totally indefense

mosquitoes biting your skin's,

taking your blood

waiting for your mum

who never showed up

I'm sorry I'm not your mum,

looking after you

wasn't enough;

you let yourself die

in search of dignity.

294

Foreigners

Foreigners now sharing

my connection with them exile

taking off has been considered

as a greater opportunity,

way better than loathing

for not finding the smile

I once looked for

at the very beginning.

293

Equinox

This equinox

this new moon

after hitting hard

new blood

being born

it all provided me

with a second chance

to admit what I did,

who I was,

needless to say

I must clarify

where I wish to go,

which the goals are

where the horizon resides,

where it is to be found.

292

Deepest

In my deepest dreams

I'm by your side

and share this thought;

that you look gorgeous

no matter fucking what,

all this while getting high

on your addictive skin.

I slowly take your T-shirt off

kiss your belly, your arms

I await and fall asleep upon you;

what else could I ask for?

290

Wrong

Everything goes wrong,

nothing left to do;

none of this due to stop.

I give myself in to the rhythm

indeed imposed by fear.

The sole act of giving up

means no more self harm

it means healing deep inside.

Hydration, morning fresh air;

nothing better than this

an open door, once again.

287

Impedimento

A un lado del ser me encuentro

impedimento el comunicar

me obstaculiza avanzar

pues no hay mayor barrera

que aquella de ser sin estar;

sé que siento,

sé que transpiro

estoy viva,

estoy consciente

en el medio del camino.

286

Between the lines

It is somehow necessary

to read between the lines

and see what is happening

since silence is a bliss

I take advantage of my blanks noticing how I breathe

and, completely out of the blue

I realise it is worth living

not at all am I in solitude,

but by nature surrounded.

285

Self portrait II

Indeed hope and death

rocks trembling all of a sudden

falling into the abyss

a blurred self portrait in my hand.

Uncontrollable quietness

the sky time after time provides

need not take soma

eyes wide open to life;

the inevitable occurs, happens -

still here, I just wander.

284

Desencuentro

Desencuentro

de un lado del muro estoy

intenta comunicar sobre el encierro

qué me provoca no avanzar

pues no hay mayor impedimento

que el de ser un estar.

Sé que siento

aunque no podría entenderlo

caminar no es sinónimo de moverse

de transitar el camino

qué te hace cuestionar

el mero desconcierto

de la verdad a ciegas.

283

Interludes

Peaceful instrumental interludes

some fresh air among voices

butterflies, hummingbirds, bees

they randomly flap their wings.

It's fussion, we collide

I find myself in a silent limbo,

who am I becoming into

towards the untimely end?

279

Trayectoria

La trayectoria de la luz

me encandila por completo

apenas descubro su figura

contoneándose la siento

en plena oscuridad la veo

no preguntes ni cómo ni por qué,

mi única seguridad es que sé

sé que se acerca el momento.

277

Gregor Samsa

Gregor Samsa almost there

breaking up with fiction,

travelling through ether

to fight against brain cells,

telling me to think twice

ordering me not to relapse

so that my unconscious mind

does not rule against all odds

it is not worth the effort

it is just one night stand.

274

Almodóvar

Life in contrast

through Almodóvar's eyes

his shades, his bright colours

I just love him

I cannot help it

scenes in loop

endlessly repeating,

yet never boring.

273

Thunderstorms

So afraid of thunderstorms

in boxes I tend to hide

so tempted to get out,

yet unable to calm down.

Please, come to me

join me on this journey

otherwise

the news will have told you

a deadly pattern of behaviour

has completely taken me.

272

Impediment

I can't seem to find the Sun

rainy weather is such an impediment

were I be able to clear up my mind

I would probably gust boundaries, lines.

What I can say is there are no borders

it is all about emotions how I perceive life through my lens,

it is all about unique standpoints.

271

Subjunctive

Wouldn't the Earth

be a much better place

if for a minute we called off

this autobiographical film?

Acting without selfishness,

becoming more empathic

conscious of the environment,

the habitat I live in looking after,

no specism no contradiction,

opening my heart a little 

giving love to this, my being,

finishing boycotting my body,

showing friends and lovers

I actually care about them

as much as I care about myself.

270

Value

Soft brownish skin

as a child I hated it

meaning my colour

once thought I was worthless,

inferior to other children;

such a dummy girl.

I am so valuable,

loved by my friends

desired by some others

who place their hands

over my tummy

claiming that my tegument

it gently wraps me

that I am such a beauty.

269

Right

The right moment

is when I feel like saying it;

feeling and not expressing

it is quite exhausting

an utter waste of time

and precious opportunities.

So nevermind, you know,

I miss you again, boy.

268

Loaded

love is that loaded gun

you pull the trigger, I'm done.

Sometimes I'm afraid to die

in that search to agonise;

that pursuit of communion

I might not come back, you know,

but you, just in case,

look at me straight in the eye

were the end one day come.

267

Shower

I miss you after the shower

I want you again, honey

your scent dancing in the dark

it makes me feel numb;

my mouth drooling over the floor,

let's get together, boy.

266

Togetherness

A sense of togetherness

that is nowhere to be found

my feelings up to date

spotted at this moment,

begging me to simply give up

"move on, your time is now".

Can't help it but writing

I'm on the verge of leaving

of unhappiness am I tired.

265

Reflection

My left hand on my belly

asking my conscience

to chill out and enjoy

the precise instant

when I stop relying on boys

as the one and only source

of satisfaction, of pleasure.

A lucky survivor,

once in the depths of despair,

not to be ruled anymore

I do love myself,

I embrace who I am

and today you're gonna learn

I'm not your doll.

264

Followers

You, followers,

you'll never read

manufactured lies

you see, I never say hi

in order to receive replies -

in your timeline I interrupt.

I prefer deep content

truth in my lines

being at my wit's end

to link ideas in my mind

instead of turning over

and produce insignificance

with the sole aim

of getting some likes.

263

A short story

I'm done with ending

I dislike pretending

that it's okay

to simply hide my pain

whilst making this way;

I'm not able to do that.

I want to be a little girl

at least once again

just to read our story,

click through pages

in restrospective,

then flash forward

to the chapter

where this never ends

so that we pretend

it's not over yet.